The BDSM Relationship Handbook, by Michael Makai



Five Stars! “This book has delivered and then some.” by John B.

It has been a while since I have read a book regarding the lifestyle and I have become really excited about it. This book has delivered and then some. Well written and easy to follow Michael gets right to the point of the subject and keeps it going the whole way through.

Right from the first chapter Michael had me hooked and I looked forward to reading more. Domination and Submission is straight to the point and covers any and all aspects of the BDSM and D/s lifestyle you would want to know about.

As I was reading I would find myself thinking what about this particular subject and a few more turns of the page and there it was.

Not only does he give good information about subjects that have been a part of the lifestyle for years but he also brings it up to date covering subjects such as meeting online, BDSM social media and dating sites; he also interjects the matter of safety in meeting people online for the first time which is so common in this digital age.

What makes the book enjoyable is that he injects a dash of humor to his writing, which gives it a nice touch and breaks it up. At the end of each chapter he includes a portion called My Two Cents where he gives a personal view of the topic. This gives the topic a more personal feel and allows you to view it from the perspective of a voice with experience.

While Michael goes into great detail explaining a subject and defining terminology he does not bog you down with overly long explanations. At the back of the book is an appendix with the terms and a full definition of each.

If you are new to the lifestyle and want to know the difference between a slave and a sub or what the protocols are for attending your local munch then this book is a must read. Were you curious on how to conduct yourself at your first play party? This book covers that topic as well. The information in this book is pertinent to some many aspects of the lifestyle.

Michael goes into talking about toys and their uses but not in a run out and get this and play with it now kind of way but he gives you the information of what it does, what it is capable of and even what its pitfalls an be if used improperly.

Even if you have been around in the lifestyle for a while it is worth reading as there are always some new tidbits of information that can be gleaned from the pages.

This book is and should be a welcome addition to your library if you have any interest in the lifestyle and want to know more.

John B.



A Must Read For All!  5 stars!  by Lil’ Red 

Anyone, both in our lifestyle or vanilla thinking about joining our community, should have this book! Michael did an absolutely beautiful job of explaining not only just the jargon we use, but some of the more in depth issues within the D/s lifestyle. Well written, witty, and the personal touch of himself in this book made this an absolute pleasure to read. Anyone from novice to Master will appreciate this wonderfully explained book about our choice of lifestyle. Easy to follow and clearly understand the topics without being a dry, boring text book that you will open once and never touch again. It will now be my go-to resource, recommended to any and all who ask “where do I start?”.

Lil’ Red



Amazon UK Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars
“Best book about BDSM I’ve read so far”, 7 Dec 2013
By “Annamiexxuk” (Bournemouth, United Kingdom)
This review is for: Domination & Submission: The BDSM Relationship Handbook (Kindle Edition)

This is truly a brilliant book. Not just easy to read, but informative, educational and honest in it’s opinions. I learned something about myself – my TRUE self – from every chapter. I’m surprised I didn’t look like a Christmas tree with all the light bulbs going off in my head! I just knew instinctively that what I read and felt were in sync, and I was able to look back over all the decades, and see the proof of what was there all the time, but at the time I thought was a bad thing, and not to be entertained! My Catholic upbringing and the views of the society that shaped my morals and thinking, had done a pretty good job of making me as judgemental and prudish as it was as a whole! I am so glad I discovered Erotic literature and begun to see who I had been burying deeep down inside, and once I let it/her (my lg) out, there has been no stopping me. I feel so liberated now, and am never going back to boring old vanilla monogamy ever again! At least not until I’m at least 80! Depending on what life throws at me in the future. In the meantime, I am embracing my newly found self with great pleasure. Read this book, it can literally change your life. Listen to what it is telling you. You may well be pleasantly surprised.It has a fair amount of humour as well as information you really NEED before or just after embarking on this journey. It doesn’t hurt for those already experienced, to read either. Everyone can learn from this book.

By the way, I have read the most recommended books – The Loving Dominant, BDSM101 and Screw the Roses Send Me the Thorns, and I have to say, they were very hard going at times, didn’t necessarily tell me what I needed to know, and were generally very stuffy with it. This book beats them all hands down!





So, you want to learn about the lifestyle?   by Regina Wade
Everything you ever wanted to know about Dominance, submission and BDSM and then some. To say this book is comprehensive is to do it a grave injustice. Comprehensive sailed about half way through and then it just went to a whole new level. Remember the scene from the movie Matilda where Mrs. Trunchbull made the fat kid eat an entire chocolate cake because he liked cake? Well, this book is like, “So you want to know about D/s, well here you go, gorge yourself on the subject.” I was curious, I mean I’d heard the buzz over Fifty Shades of Grey, and by the way, if you have read that book and think you know all there is to know about the subject, boy are you wrong. Although I admit to never having read FSOG, I have read some incredible BDSM themed fiction and a well written real life submissive’s account of finding true love in the lifestyle and I was interested in reading a real life Dominant’s POV.

This book reads like a college course in Dominant/submissive 101. The term clinical even came to mind more once or twice, but don’t let that deter you. Mr. Makai uses doses of humor and snark to make it all palatable. He pulls no punches and makes no attempt to glamorize the lifestyle. He does, however, make it perfectly clear that if you go in with your eyes open and take proper precautions it can be a very rewarding lifestyle indeed. How do you take the proper precautions? There’s a chapter for that. I think I’m a submissive. What’s my next step? There’s a chapter for that. How do I meet other people in the lifestyle? There’s a chapter for that. I heard that kinky folk ….. Is that really a thing? Believe me, there’s more than likely a chapter for that too.

My usual requirement for leaving a review for a book is that I read the entire book, every word. I broke that requirement for this book. I simply wasn’t able to read every single word in all of the chapters, see the “comprehensive” remark earlier, and this book is not written to make that necessary. It is, for all practical purposes, a great D/s BDSM reference book. I did, however, read the vast majority of each and every chapter and never missed reading the end of each chapter. This is where my reason for reading the book lives. Mr. Makai closes each chapter with a personal account of his experience with the chapter’s subject matter. These sections are, in my opinion, the heart and soul of this book. After you’ve been definitioned and cautioned and shocked into submission (pun partly intended) now it’s time for the aftercare. Here we get a peek into the mind of a dominant, the real life workings of a D/s relationship. Do not expect an explicitly graphic look into the bedroom, you’ll be disappointed. But you will get an intimate look into the dynamics that make these relationships work or not work.

So, should you bother to read this book? I found it well written, the author knowledgeable, the subject matter certainly interesting. A little more of the personal insights and real life scenarios would have earned it a 4 star rating from me. So of course you should read this book, for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is you may learn something about lifestyles that are different from your own and about the people who practice them and surprisingly, you may learn something about yourself in the process.

Regina Wade





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